Page 32 - Issue 05 2nd edition
P. 32

If there is one thing that I have learnt              distance or at your fingertips.
          over the years is that when you are going             Unfortunately, this is probably not the
          through s*** it is easier to navigate to              case. Your closest face-to-face group may
          the other side when you have the support              be so far away that it is not practical, in
          that you need AND deserve. There is a                 which case on-line it is.
          saying that “a picture pains a thousand
          words: however, it has to be the right                Let’s image that we are in that wonderful
          picture.                                              ideal world and have loads of choices.
                                                                Now let’s compare the merits (and the
          We have frequent reminders of that when               opposite) of face-to-face meetings with
          beneficial advice about dealing with                  on-line support
          infertility and childlessness is ruined by
          the pictures of bouncing babies that the              Face-to-face merits: groups in the “real
          media feel is obligatory to such articles.            world” are great because you actually get
                                                                to meet people. Also, if you find that you
          What has this got to do with support? Well            have a real connection with anyone, there
          support is only REALLY support when it is             are opportunities for grabbing a cup of
          the RIGHT support.                                    coffee or sharing a pizza from time to
                                                                time. In addition, some support groups
          So, how do know if it’s the right support?            invite alternative therapy practitioners to
                                                                give taster-sessions for you could
          Partly this is going to be trial and error:           experience something like Rieke for the
          you won’t know that it’s the wrong                    first time.
          support group until you realise that you
          are not getting the support you need.                 Face-to-face drawbacks: when you are
          That being said there are some things you             feeling at your most vulnerable and in
          can do before them to increase your                   need of support this is often when you
          chances of joining the right group(s) in              find it harder to leave the house or meet
          the first place. So, time to put by Business          people in public. Although other group
          Analyst hat back on and give you a step               members won’t be judgemental it takes
          by step logical process!                              extra courage to go to a meeting when
                                                                your eyes are swollen from crying so
          1. Let’s get physical                                 much or you haven’t brushed your hair in
                                                                a week.
          In support the first question to ask
          yourself is do you want to find support               On-line merits: the groups are there
          that is local to you, so you can attend               24/7 if you need them. There are also far
          physical meetings, or do you prefer the               more options, so you can belong to
          flexibility and slight anonymity of on-line           different types of groups to “nurture”
          groups? Only you can answer that. In an               different aspects of your life. You can
          ideal world you would have a plethora of              belong to specifically CNBC support
          both types of groups within easy driving              groups as well as infertility groups, self-

          32                    The Childless Not By Choice Magazine: Sept/Oct 2018 Issue #05
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